The End of Death Stranding: Occult Bluepill Black Magic vs. Big Jesus 5.56 MAGA Rounds

Part 2

By Kyle B. Stiff

The ending to our two-part analysis of Death Stranding as a bluepilled take on the current American civil war focuses on characters who came to the forefront at the end of the game. As such, this is going to be SPOILER CENTRAL. Play this fantastic game before you ruin it by reading this senses-shattering piece. If you want something relatively spoiler-free, check out the first part of my Death Stranding analysis. It is also senses-shattering, and has actually ruined many lives.

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As for the ending to Death Stranding, one can’t help but notice that Sam has to pick up a gun in order to save the day. Actually, not just guns, but freaking bazookas and other advanced state of the art bang-bangs. As for package handling, it was great to see the new type of gameplay that Death Stranding had to offer, but ultimately, force is required in order to solve problems, which is why the latter part of Death Stranding is a bullet-fueled battle to the death. It could be no other way. As old age advances and the testosterone drains from Kojima’s body, it makes sense that he would want to tell a story about connecting rather than killing, but in the end he must acknowledge the truth: War is the only thing that’s real. War isn’t an unfortunate breakdown of peace, but rather, peace is a temporary break from the endless war to survive. We don’t define ourselves by sleep, but by action, and so it is that even bluepilled bug connoisseur Sam Bridges must pick up a gun and annihilate the opposition!

For this character analysis, we’re going to start with an exceedingly spicy contender.

 

Higgs, the God Particle

Higgs may not be the primary antagonist, but he is the main “bad guy” of our story. He’s the evil force that must be stomped flat. This guy really bends and twists my theory out of place, but I don’t think he breaks it. Because Death Stranding leans left, Higgs has a lot of right-wing tendencies. He looks like a commando, he waves a gun around, he’s a conspiracy theorist, etc. However, Kojima is a very honest storyteller, and you can’t tell an honest story and also make it lean left, as it’ll just be propaganda. That means Higgs also has a lot of weird lefty stuff going on, too. He’s complicated, so let’s dive in.

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As Sam fights to make real the dream of Hillary Clinton – I mean, Bridget Strand – and connect America through the chiral network, Higgs reveals that he wants the chiral network completed. This highlights the intense fear of liberals that the wonderfully progressive world they are building will be taken over by right-wing fanatics. Specifically, they don’t like conservatives using the internet as a place to argue about ideas. The Big Tech left wants the internet to be a living document filled with cat pics, cuck porn, ads from giant globalist corporations using diversity to sell products, and of course e-thots shilling their gamer girl bathwater. The LAST thing they want is people arguing about the best way to govern themselves. Why is that? Well, I’ll give you a hint: Unrestricted discussions on self-determination always lead to nationalism, not pro-diversity melting pots, as all unrestricted web sites tend to shift right. Only strict monitoring and censorship can maintain the tender, genteel nature of left-leaning forums.

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So Higgs is glad when Sam completes the chiral network. In his interview, Higgs says, “Death and destruction are part and parcel of the human condition, and bringing people together only exacerbates that.” Higgs is in right-wing mode, and his statement directly parallels mayor of London Sadiq Khan’s ruthlessly liberal statement, “Terrorism is just part and parcel of living in a big city.” This statement is often brought up by those on the right to show how intensely cruel and bottom-line oriented liberals can be when it comes to choosing between diversity or safety (or progressive dystopia versus traditionalism). So far, Higgs is the perfect bogeyman for a left-leaning story.

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Now let’s complicate things and look at Higgs’s creepy lefty nature. First off, he’s named after the Higgs Boson particle, which was so important to normie Reddit “pro-science” types that they called it the God Particle. Remember, even as left-leaning types scoff at the idea of God (unless it’s a touchy-feely New Age ball of light or a goddess), they are still driven by a desperate desire to be taken as serious as Christianity was in the medieval era. Science is their religion, but not even science in terms of investigating the universe, but science as a collection of orthodoxy that must be defended at all costs. These are people who have seen very little of the world and don’t study history, but will become insane with rage if they hear that someone believes the earth is housed inside a big dome made of plywood with stars painted on the inside. To them, the materialistic world view of Star Trek *must* be true… or else!

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Higgs is an “atomized” man, disconnected from others and able to communicate only through violence. To him, the connections made by others only give him more opportunity to deceive and take advantage. He hates the world and wants it to end. You could say that he has an anti-spiritual nature, which would place him well outside of a traditionalist paradigm, as it’s hard to find a traditional belief system that doesn’t focus on the creation of the world by one God or many gods. You might think that his Egyptian regalia would complicate things further, but I don’t think it does. Egyptian mythology may have been one thing in the past, but in our modern world, it is perhaps the most important set of iconography used by the… well, let’s just call it the Illuminati. Who the hell knows what they’re actually called? But you know what I mean – occult Hollywood Masonic types who are constantly covering one eye, going to weird parties dressed up as Sith acolytes, and starring in movies and music videos showing evil priests and bigoted Christians. At this point it’s no longer even hidden, although you’re still considered crazy if you talk about it.

Point being, Higgs kind of makes a perfect *left* leaning villain because he wears an Egyptian cape, is named after a particle made on accident without divine influence, and wants to watch the world burn. Even better, his incubator doesn’t even have a living baby in it – he carries a lifeless doll made with black market tech. His baby has, in a sense, been “aborted”. He even shoots at Lou – he must think of our cutie as nothing but a “clump of cells”!

Okay, now let’s go even deeper. Believe it or not, we’ve been in normie-friendly territory so far. It’s about to get weird. The thing is, at the end of the game you find out that one of your clients, mild-mannered pizza-enthusiast Peter Engler, is in fact your arch-villain Higgs. When you go through Peter Engler’s emails after you find this out, his excitement regarding pizza is no longer mildly amusing, but freaking weird and creepy. That’s because… you guessed it… Higgs is part of the PizzaGate conspiracy! He’s one of *them*!

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For those of you who don’t know, here’s a little background. The Podesta email leak was riddled with high-level Democrats making some pretty obviously coded references, most of them pizza-based. The emails revealed a link to James Alefantis, owner of a DC pizza joint which had a… let’s say… a very interesting history and Instagram account. Despite running a small pizza joint, he had connections to powerful people all around the world. Right-wing types capable of seeing patterns went running with the narrative of the pizza joint being used as a child sex trafficking hub, and left-wing types formed a phalanx shield wall to protect some of the weirdest people imaginable.

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From this perspective, Higgs’s “Peter Engler” pseudonym takes on an incredibly sinister tone, especially when you finally enter his bunker and realize he was obsessed with Sam Bridges. He even has a photo of Sam wrecking his bike with the comment “LOL” written beside it, which actually is pretty lolworthy. Actually this should be disturbing to both the right and the left. From a liberal perspective, a conspiracy theorist is one of the worst things a person can be. Pedophiles and murderers can always be forgiven, but a conspiracy theorist is, from their perspective, truly reprehensible and even dangerous. And from a conservative perspective, the fact that Higgs has photos of Sam with lines connecting them with bizarre text descriptions is similar to internet shills, people paid to roam the internet and take screenshots of conservatives being “politically incorrect”. Conservative types like Nick Fuentes often note how these people bring up screenshots of spicy twitter commentary or video clips that are years old, and it’s like, how did these people find this stuff? How did they organize it, for that matter? The fact that it must be a paid gig for these people is actually the *least* disturbing scenario, as imagining someone using their free time to monitor the internet for instances of wrongthink is just straight up nauseating.

 

This may be too much detail, but Higgs’s pseudonym, Peter Engler, translates to “stone angel” (peter = Greek petros, for stone, and Engler is derived from the German engel or angel). Thus Higgs is highlighting his nature as a fallen angel cast down to the earth. Also, as long as we’re breaking down names, I wouldn’t be the first person to point out that the central figure of the PizzaGate conspiracy, James Alefantis, is a pseudonym derived from the French phrase “j’aime les enfants” or “I love children”. Which would make sense, since he’s actually a Rothschild, a member of one of the most notorious families in conspiracy canon!

Also, if Higgs is a child violator, then it would make sense for him to unnaturally age Fragile’s body. From his perspective, making someone old is the cruelest thing imaginable!

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Before we climb out of the Higgs rabbit hole, let me say that one of the coolest things you can do is make Sam wear a red Bridges hat at the end of the game. Even though Sam is super bluepilled and can literally eat bugs to survive the battle with Higgs (it doesn’t get any more bluepilled than cockroach soyburgers), if you put him in a red hat, then it looks like the final battle is taking place between God’s anointed MAGA-lovin’ Bible-thumpin’ Budweiser-chuggin’ nationalistic blue collar Boomer champion versus an Egyptian Talmudic sorcerer supreme “pizza”-mongerin’ drug-abusin’ Crowley occult disciple globalist elitist. It’s seriously epic. Just imagine a movie made in 2100 AD about our era, the details are off a little but the movie shows Trump grappling with George Soros in hand-to-hand combat… point being, that’s kind of what the final battle looks like. I would have recorded it myself but, sadly, I’m kind of an idiot! Just trust me and put on the red hat!

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Unfortunately the bug-eating in the end is pretty demoralizing. Since my gaming skills aren’t going to improve anytime soon, which makes eating bugs a necessity, I’ll just have to pray for some DLC where the bug-eating sequence at the end is replaced with Sam gobblin’ Monsanto-burgers thrown at him by the ghost of Kazuhira Miller.

 

Cliff Unger Is the Right-Wing Ideal… Kill Him!!!

Cliff is the definition of a soldier and a family man, a father willing to do anything to protect the next generation. Kojima does a great job of treating him in a respectful manner, but since the narrative thrust of the story is bluepilled, Cliff ends up damning himself. To quote him: “I was just like any other cliff. A dead end, no way forward. Nothing but an obstacle – looking on at the world people like you were trying to build. Dividing people was the only thing I was ever good at.”

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Dividing people? Yeah, right! Cliff is an alpha male with a warrior spirit. God makes people like Cliff so that nations can be protected from invaders. It’s not like Cliff was on the sidelines master-minding race wars and false flag attacks and border squabbles. Bluepilled liberals always imagine that evil racists are opposing them out of pure hatred and stupidity, but guys like Cliff who put their ass on the line make it possible for utopian idealists to post cringe without having to worry about invaders barging in and turning them into pinatas. (Of course, the danger of being turned into a pinata increases in direct proportion to voting for open borders.)

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Cliff’s last words are, “It’s all my fault,” which is in line with conservatives placing the onus of responsibility on themselves, even to the point of blaming themselves when things fall apart. Conservatives (especially Christian ones) believe that mankind has a sinful nature – that is, people are flawed. They’re imperfect. That’s why utopias never work. You can’t immanentize the eschaton, as big brain types like to say. You have to work with the world as it is rather than dream of the world being something that it’s not. It’s sad that Cliff is technically a villain, a boss who must be beaten, but then again, I guess it’s better that we get to see a red-blooded redpilled red-meat-eatin’ son of a bitch who lives in an endless war fantasy rather than a whiny bluepilled bluehair who scowls at Sam and says everything is the fault of men, or white people, or old people, or straight people, or the rich, or Christians – basically, anyone but himself!

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In Cliff Unger’s endless dream of war, he has baby dolls (fake BBs) strung up all over the place, and he obsesses over his lost baby. This, plus his devotion to his comatose wife, is a great reminder that men who are militant and take border security seriously are driven by an intense desire to protect. That instinct is the force that gives life to conservative thought; conservative means of course “to conserve”. Liberals are driven by other forces. They do not have this violent protective drive, or they have it only in a very stunted manner. In fact, the drive to use force to protect family and culture and nation is so foreign to liberals that they can really only see it as racism, a totally outdated, backward, knee-jerk hatred of the unknown. In other words, they consider it a bestial drive that we need to “progress” beyond.

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Cliff has way more in common with Solid Snake than with Sam, who would rather peacefully move packages or hang out in his room with his figurine collection. The basic idea of Clifford is that he’s a real man from the past, something anachronistic that our bluepilled hero needs to overcome. But in order to overcome him, Sam must become like him, which means he has to use state of the art pew pews and big dick bang bangs and even grenades filled with literal feces.

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Even though you have to “overcome” Cliff, I have to reiterate that Kojima treats this antagonist with a great deal of respect. Most bluepilled types would not. I remember reading Marvel comics in the 90s, and a lot of it was total propaganda filled with whacko nationalist bad guys. Comics only got progressively worse. I remember glancing through a Wolverine comic a few years ago, and saw him facing off against some giant, obese white guy with an American flag tattooed on his face. The guy was leering at Wolverine with unrestrained villainy, his body no doubt bloated from a diet of hatred for all things un-American. He would have worn a MAGA hat if such a thing had been invented yet, but alas, this was in the early 2010s when I saw this particular comic. The point is, if Kojima had grown up taking a daily dose of bluepills, that’s probably what Cliff Unger would have been. Thankfully Kojima has only lately taken a handful of bluepills, so his incredible body-mind-soul matrix are still functioning within acceptable parameters.

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One more thing about Clifford Unger. Note that he mentions space and the moon. He thinks space exploration is cool, and is something that we should start doing again. This reminds me of Alex Jones saying that it’s our duty to conquer the stars, a concept I’ve always been obsessed with. I hate to say it, but liberals really only care about space insofar as it provides them yet another field of orthodoxy they can monitor and make sure no wrongthink is occurring. The idea of weaponizing Space Force, tackling alien species, crushing opponents and siding with powerful and like-minded allies, exploiting the resources of other worlds, and basically spreading our dominance throughout the cosmos is foreign to the left-leaning mindset.

If space exploration isn’t an enlightened Star Trek circle-jerk, they ain’t interested!

 

Amelie, the Cult of Child Sacrifice, and Feminism

At the end of the game, Sam reaches California, the end goal of so many who dream of fame and fortune. Surrounded by demonic predators, he makes his way through streets flooded with black tar. This makes sense when you consider that Hollywood is the capital of the bizarre alternate dimension where the Illuminati spin endless cinema stories that tend to be anti-American and anti-Christian and pro-everything that leans left. In the based 80s California was a beautiful paradise, but now it’s a dump that people can’t get away from fast enough, and the poor people who are stuck there have to download apps to help them navigate through a labyrinth of human feces, used syringes, and… let’s just say… delightfully diverse neighborhoods. So it’s very, very appropriate that a game about our contemporary American civil war ends in California, which is currently being sucked into a gateway to hell!

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But poor Sam, deluded bluepilled nice guy that he is, unwittingly takes part in a ritual of child sacrifice. Just like so many clueless celebrities who end up doing really weird shit in order to “join the club”, as they say, Sam plops a baby down on the altar of the last Knot to be connected and watches as it disappears into the grinding gears of progress. “Oh well,” he probably told himself, “it was just a clump of cells anyway. Right?”

The theme of child sacrifice is a strange thread that hangs out in the background of human history until you really start noticing it – and then it pops out in lurid detail. It’s just as big now as it ever was. Whether it’s Canaanites sacrificing babies to Molech and Rephan, or Carthaginians burning babies for Tanit and Baal Hammon, or conspiracy culture theorizing about political and Hollywood elite sacrificing babies to a statue of an owl god in exchange for power, or even young women killing babies for a career or just so they can continue hedonistic self-serving lifestyles, child sacrifice never stopped, and it’s all the same no matter the window dressing. Keep in mind that this is the exact opposite of the conservative ideal of parents sacrificing for their children, which is how civilizations are actually built and maintained. But, sadly, you don’t get any record deals for perpetuating the species.

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After the sacrifice is made, Sam finds out that he was very nearly aborted, too. He was almost a bridge baby sacrificed so that a bluepilled civilization could continue. He even receives a stigmata-like cross on his belly, marking him as a sacrifice denied to the BT demons who rule in the underworld.

When Sam reaches Amelie’s beach, she gives her “villain’s monologue”, which is about her theory that human extinction provides a way for other species to survive. Her insane take on extinction is straight out of the liberal playbook. Can’t you imagine her on CNN telling an applauding audience that if we *just* sacrifice America, or if we *just* sacrifice the middle class, or if we *just* sacrifice white people, then humanity as a whole will achieve utopia? The interesting thing is that instead of sounding like an anime villain, she has a sweet, maternal tone that is hypnotic. She almost sounds as if she cares about the world, or at least about Sam, even as she hungers for our extinction.

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“What the hell did they do to you?” Sam asks. Poor Sam is like the liberals of a bygone era who believed in unions and sensible limits on mega-corporations, and has just woken up to the fact that his sister or his mother only adopted liberal philosophy as a means of destroying civilization by importing millions of third-worlders with substandard IQ and teaching children how to fellate pedophiles during state-mandated drag queen story hour. Sam is horrified to realize that the chiral network he has been working so hard to build will be used to erase the human species.

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The fact that Amelie is the Extinction Entity perfectly highlights contemporary right-wing philosophy on women as the feral sex. According to this philosophy, without something holding them back, women will always vote left. They can’t help themselves. Women will always vote for open borders, for mass child sacrifice, for censorship. Women are naturally drawn to Islam over Christianity. They will always vote for lenient prison sentences for criminals, but they think instances of wrongspeech or wrongthink should be punished with loss of livelihood and permanent exile. You get the idea. But from this perspective, it makes Sam’s confrontation with Amelie especially painful, as he is forced to face this person that he thought he loved as she stands on the brink of destroying the world.

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Amelie even says, “America is a lie.” This is pretty much the root of the liberal mindset, a stewing maelstrom of resentment and disgust with the very nation they live within. The fact that the rest of the world would give anything to be here is completely lost on them.

“Promise you’ll stop me. Don’t let me end it all,” Amelie pleads. Unfortunately Sam can do nothing to convince her. At this point his hormones are completely fucked from a diet of bugs and Monster Energy Drank, causing his T-levels to drop so low that he could suckle Lou on the soy milk produced by his own giant breasts. Testosterone is the weapon you need to equip in order to get rabid lefties under control, and Sam just doesn’t have that weapon in his inventory. In fact Sam even literally turns blue during this confrontation because he is dying from a bluepill overdose – look closely if you think I’m exaggerating. His nihilism reaches its apex and as he enters the final stages of a fatal case of TDS, he pulls a gun, puts it to his own head, and pulls the trigger.

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Sam’s “dark night of the soul” parallels the awakening process of every newborn right-winger. Lots of people have noticed the libertarian-to-right-wing pipeline that leads in a straight line away from well-meaning libertarianism, a philosophy that says all people are, at their core, decent. The pipeline only goes one way, not the other. All it takes is a few run-ins with the dark side of human nature before “nice guy” libertarians realize that some people truly are driven by an insane urge for destruction, and those dangerous people have to be stopped or they will turn civilization into a place where children cannot be safely raised.

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Unfortunately Sam doesn’t have the benefits of the internet like we do. We have to assume that in the future-world of Death Stranding, the internet was deemed too problematic and was done away with, and replaced with the chiral network, which is really only good for consumption. You can’t print ideas and arguments on a chiral printer. Without any new ideas to guide him, poor Sam is left stranded on the Beach, thinking he is the first man to come face-to-face with an insane woman who dreams of opening the border between the land of the living and the land of the dead just so she can virtue signal and get a few “likes” in the final moments before the human race is annihilated.

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I can’t help but think that Cliff Unger would have had a much easier time handling Amelie than Sam. “You’re giving me a gun so I can either shoot you or hug you?” he would say, then without hesitation he would have started popping off rounds, putting two in the chest and two more in the head just to be sure. Think about it, we have no idea what happened to Cliff’s wife and why she ended up comatose. I think it’s safe to assume he found out she wanted to vote for Bridget Strand because Orange Man Bad, so he suplexed her and knocked her out permanently. That doesn’t mean he never loved his wife – he did. It just means he didn’t want his child to be raised on a diet of bugs and going door to door campaigning to put an Extinction Entity in the White House.

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Mama and Lockne are New Age Goofballs

Something needs to be pointed out regarding our twin cuties Mama and Lockne. Did you notice that these chicks sound like they’re trapped in a cult? I wouldn’t blame anyone for not noticing, because these twins are some SERIOUS CUTIES, and we’re biologically programmed to allow cuties to get away with anything. If we met them in real life, most men would simply nod and smile if these ladies started rambling on about their cult of We Are All One.

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Their story is pretty lefty, too. It reaches its conclusion right after we get the chiral artist and the junk dealer to tie the knot. They’re straight, male and female, so I guess from a lefty perspective it’s like, YAWN, bo-o-o-oring! Thankfully their marriage immediately falls apart and the chiral artist decides to walk through BT-infested terrain just to move back in with her conniving mother.

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After that storyline, Sam hauls Mama through a gauntlet of terrorists, BTs, deadly timefall, and of course me constantly tripping over rocks and riding ass-first down mountainsides with my legs splayed open, basically turning her body into a piece of cheddar on a cheese grater. In some sense she was dead the moment Sam picked her up. But, never fear! As soon as I reached our destination and plopped her down and said, “Okay, see, what had happened wuz…” Lockne cut me off and went off on her first of many creepy cult monologues. This bitch starts channeling Mama, and Mama’s just as fucked up as her goofy-ass sister! Then Lockne climbed on top of Mama’s corpse and we, the viewer, are forced to endure a narcissistic love scene that can only be described as MOIST. Ugh, sorry.

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Point being, in a bluepilled world, traditional marriage doesn’t hold a candle to two women who love each other forever and can overcome anything that gets between them, even death.

 

Heartman Is a Hero

I hope you guys are ready for a real shocker, because this dude Heartman really threw me for a loop. When I walked into his home and saw his fashionable outfit, his posture, and his general lack of a chin, I thought he was going to end up becoming Sam’s girlfriend. Little did I know freaking Heartman is the most redpilled son of a bitch in the entire game!

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Heartman has an insane work-life-family balance and goes through hell on his endless quest to put his family back together. This is a man who knows that family means everything! He is regimented to an autistic degree, even foregoing the joys of a forty-five minute poop so that he can stay on schedule.

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He’s as conservative as they come. Don’t believe me? At one point he says, “The past informs the present and aids us in building the future.” This is Conservatism 101, and in the bluepilled and hormonally deficient world of Death Stranding, you could actually kill someone telling them something like that!

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What does Heartman think of diversity? He hates it with the burning hatred of ten thousand suns, and for proof, I submit this quote: “Too many Beaches sharing the same space. Wires get crossed and so forth.” Yikes. Talk about problematic! Compared to Amelie, who wants to erase the borders between all Beaches, Heartman has basically watched one too many YouTube vids showing various diversity meltdowns, including machete attacks, acid attacks, and everyone’s personal favorite, the dreaded Rental Truck Attack.

Okay, Heartman. Lay off the discrimination and hateful rhetoric, will you? We’re trying to go extinct over here!

 

Thanks for reading! If you want to take a look at my books, they can be found HERE.

Home Alone’s Kevin McCallister Is a Right-Wing Bigot!

By Kyle B. Stiff

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Merry Christmas everyone! Well, actually, it’s not going to be merry because I’m going to ruin it – again – by proving that Home Alone is “problematic” to say the least. YouTube is doing a great job of using censorship to keep free speech from ruining America, but it turns out a neurotic fear of nationalism is not going to be enough to stop what is coming. That’s because every Christmas, Home Alone plays on cable and network television, and Home Alone is basically a right-wing recruitment video beamed directly into the minds of young men who, sadly, are inclined to protect their nation rather than let it degenerate into a progressive utopia.

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Kevin McCallister, the protagonist of our tale, is fated to become a right-wing bigot, but he starts out as a libertarian individualist. He comes from a large, wealthy family oozing with privilege. They’re loud and pushy and vulgar and Kevin just wants to be left alone. When his family packs their bags to go be colonizers in a third-world dump, Kevin gets his wish for some alone time.

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Like every naive, fun-loving libertarian, Kevin enjoys his newfound freedom. Though the pacing makes it seem like Kevin goes totally nuts when his family leaves, he doesn’t actually do anything too crazy. He orders pizzas, he plays some pranks, he watches some forbidden movies (fortunately he’s not a filthy coomer), and he does his own shopping on the free market. He’s fairly level-headed.

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But the path from libertarian to right-wing fanatic is pretty well-documented at this point, and Kevin soon learns the same lesson that all libertarians learn. His home is targeted by two “urban youths” who have no interest in the marketplace of ideas. They can’t be reasoned with, and in fact they are so damaged inside that there is no place for them in a rational society. Kevin’s libertarian “live and let live” philosophy breaks down when it comes to dealing with these “urban youths”. Playtime is over, and he must endure a dark night of the soul, sitting at the bedside of his dying idealism as it metaphorically shits the bed.

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Kevin does what every libertarian does when his values are destroyed by the reality of human stupidity and violence: He goes to church. In the past he may have laughed and mockingly tipped his fedora at the unwashed masses who believe in invisible things, but he is now in desperate need of something to hold onto. While at church he realizes that the backbone of civilization isn’t reddit and Bill Nye and video games, it isn’t a free market run by mercenary laborers and globalists, and it isn’t even tolerance or goodwill or white-knighting for the minority-of-the-week. It’s the Church. The Church is the one thing that brings all families together, and turns warring tribes into cooperative nations. When Kevin humbles himself before the cross and prays for deliverance from his enemies, he is radicalized by the ultimate enemy of all liberals: An old white man!

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Kevin was once terrified of this old white man, and like all good libertarians he joined in with the liberals when they were gossiping and heaping shame on this harmless boomer. But now that he’s afraid, the scary old white man’s strange ideas no longer seem so strange. In fact, his weird ideas about the importance of family and the nature of human sin start making a lot of sense. As the scary old white man rambles on like a YouTube series featuring Alex Jones fused with Nick Fuentes, Kevin sees glimpses of a thousand mile wall separating his family from a rampaging horde of landless mercenaries, and at that moment Kevin finally understands the truth…

The only thing that can protect his home – is FORCE!

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Kevin McCallister’s run home is of course one of the most powerful moments in cinema. The libertarian dream is over; Kevin knows that FAMILY is the only thing that matters. He draws up plans and arms himself for war, even putting on his grandfather’s old SS badge and Iron Cross (this was edited out after the theatrical release). As Kevin turns every entry point of his home into a death trap in an inspiring montage, one can almost hear “… the Wall just got ten feet higher!” echoing in the background.

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The “urban youths” begin their rampage with guttural cries and pleas for handouts wrapped in a thin veil of threats. Kevin’s liberal neighbors know exactly what is happening, but instead of helping they hide under their beds and tweet about Orange Man Bad and Impeach Drumpf. But God is on Kevin’s side and even the old white man joins in the battle, forming a holy alliance of boomer and zoomer against criminal degeneracy. If anyone in the neighborhood filmed the battle then I have no doubt their video was immediately taken off YouTube by lefty Big Tech censorship, because they live in fear of what would happen if images of the impaled bodies of hardened criminals went viral while boomers and zoomers clasped hands like that Predator meme showing two musclebound arms locked in solidarity.

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In the end, Kevin is reunited with his family. His mother hugs him even though he is covered in gore and the living room has been turned into a slaughterhouse filled with twitching limbs and the groans of the dying. She knows that despite slipping bluepills into his soyburgers and bug juice his entire life, he is now a man. His foreskin has been reclaimed and their family will continue to exist only because of little Kevin’s willingness to meet violence with violence. She stares at him in awe because she feared this moment would come. She had always imagined that the light of innocence would go out of his eyes after his baptism of blood – but instead, she is blinded by the radiant aura surrounding his being, filling their home with the divine joy of ten million Christmases safe within an American Empire spanning from one end of the galaxy to the other.

Hideo Kojima Saves America with Bluepills in Death Stranding

Part 1

By Kyle B. Stiff

The world is a battlefield between rival ideologies and occult groups. As I watch movies and play games and break down their hidden meaning, I can usually depend on Japanese stories to be free of what we call “Illuminati” symbolism, whereas Hollywood movies push the symbolism so hard that it’s kind of a joke at this point. But Death Stranding is an interesting case because left-leaning Illuminati ideology is on full display.

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This will be a relatively spoiler-free breakdown that only covers the first half of the game. Please note that despite giving him a hard time, I am a huge fan of Hideo Kojima. Like a lot of artists who naturally pick up on cultural vibes, he’s allowed liberal indoctrination to slip through his AT Field and infect his brain. This doesn’t keep him from being an amazing entertainer, nor does it prevent Death Stranding from being a great and interesting game, but we have a duty to point out cringe when we see it.

I’m sure we can all agree that testosterone is a divine hormonal matrix that only some of us are blessed to wield. It grants the wielder the power to tell a story fearlessly, rather than doubt oneself endlessly until death comes to silence our fears. From the beginning of Death Stranding one can’t help but notice that Kojima is getting older and his testosterone levels are dropping. His Metal Gear Solid series had military dudes, bombastic soundtracks, bouncing tits, button-mashing during torture scenes, guys shitting themselves and getting stuffed into porta Johns, “Nanomachines, son!”, child soldiers committing based war crimes, babies born on the battlefield, and so on. Death Stranding tones it down a notch with sedate music and the idea that if somebody gets killed (or even dies), it results in a voidout that can destroy an entire city.

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Rather than a proper end for a wild ride, death is seen as a disaster, which is an opinion free of testosterone. Remember, being smart and avoiding danger may seem very clever, but in the end it can only get you in a nursing home, lying in bed trying to put together the pieces of an identity that is beyond repair. It is a fate fit only for bugmen.

Ah, but we were talking about the lefty perspective in Death Stranding, weren’t we? Let’s move on to characters!

 

President Bridget is Hillary Clinton

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Sam’s mother represents – of course – none other than Hillary Clinton. Not as a bug-eyed psychopath and queen of cringe, of course, but as the warm, empathic, and divine feminine Mother Goddess that liberals see her as. Her name, Bridget, signifies that she builds bridges, not walls, which is either inspirational or cringe depending on your perspective. Sam’s first mission, a very poignant slog in which he must carry his mother’s corpse to an incinerator, is reminiscent of the absolute dark night of the soul felt by liberals at having to bury the dream of Hillary as President. I’m trying to be diplomatic so I won’t comment on what the rain in this mission represents. Bridget (and Hillary) were supposed to put America back together again, and the people scrambling to keep her alive, and then cover up her death, represent the mainstream media going into overdrive spinning a narrative to galvanize the populace.

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Die-Hardman is Barack Obama

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The way this guy looks and carries himself is a great indicator of how liberals see Obama. Rather than the stuttering dufus who needed a teleprompter to speak to school children, or a low-T Indonesian married to a linebacker packing some serious cucumber, here we see Obama as a barrel-chested alpha who runs the UCA after Bridget’s unfortunate passing. As in real life, this guy just won’t go away. Also note that in his mask, Die-Hardman looks a lot like this alleged pic of Obama dressed as some kind of goofy Illuminati demon:

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Sam Bridges is an Everyman Boomer DOOMer

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Everyone living in the ruins of America is stuck isolated in bunkers, unable to connect with one another in person but addicted to texting page after page of nonsense for the player to trudge through, but Sam is a boomer who can get things done. If he was born in our era, he would mow the lawn at six in the morning, request seating in a restaurant, and pay off his kids’ credit card bills. He gets things done as only old people can.

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However, Sam lives in his own era, which means he’s contracted the same fatal autism that everyone else suffers. He’s afraid of physical contact, he has trouble communicating, and he even collects action figures. He wants to abandon the old world but he’s literally chained to his job. When Sam is given a BB (“baby”) and it starts having flashbacks to its real father, we get the sense that Sam is in an extremely bluepilled “my wife’s son” type of situation; however, Sam does have some old school backbone, because he’s the only man in the UCA who protests aborting the baby. He knows the baby is more than just equipment – or more than a clump of cells, as they say in our era.

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Now, don’t get me wrong about this bluepill stuff. I’m not saying that Kojima is a lefty NPC relentlessly pushing whatever Hollywood says must be pushed. Obviously he’s not, or his games would be unplayable. But as an artist, as a creative type, his brain is an antenna made for picking up on the cultural zeitgeist and then remixing it through the prism of his own unique self. All artists do this. Kojima was called to tell a story about the conflict happening in America right now, and since that conflict is so complicated, we are forced to pick sides so we can take narrative shortcuts. There’s nothing wrong with this; we have to be able to identify friend or foe at a glance, and that’s why our current conflict can be broken down into Redhats versus Bluehairs.

Unfortunately Kojima leans left in Death Stranding, which can be off-putting when gamers are in the mood for a heroic tale about a man slaying the enemies of America in a ritual of purification and reunion. Even though Kojima has revolutionized package handling gameplay just like he did stealth gameplay, a lot of gamers have been underwhelmed. And I can see why: Gaming is inherently redpilled and right wing. You can’t slay monsters and save the princess by bending over for them, otherwise you end up with something like Undertale – a sappy, sentimental mess with a notoriously toxic fan base. Considering its goofy level of pacifism, Death Stranding is dangerously close to crossing into territory where the unindoctrinated cannot go.

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But as I said earlier, protagonist Sam Bridges is not a total lefty strung out on mood enhancing drugs. Kojima makes an effort to turn Sam into a Christlike figure, whose blood is redemptive and capable of cleansing the nation. Just as Jesus Christ was able to drive out demons and unclean spirits, Sam’s blood can be used in an alchemical process to kill or drive off BTs, which are the spirits of the dead. (I may be wrong on BTs being ghosts since I haven’t finished the game yet.)

This is of course the heretical idea that people can save themselves. One NPC even explicitly says that he doesn’t believe in grace or miracles – only people. Which is like saying you believe in books but not authors. It’s peak liberal enlightenment. The only way to make it more liberal would be to have a drag queen telling it to a child during government-mandated storytime. Another NPC in a long, rambling email even calls Sam the Great Deliverer. It’s a throwaway line, but it makes sense for a materialist bugman to see the Amazon delivery guy as a messiah. I’m hoping that later on in the game we will be introduced to some characters who challenge Sam’s role as the Mail Messiah the same way the AI in MGS2 challenged Raiden’s belief that he was a real person rather than a mere video game character.

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Fragile Is Every “Basic Bitch” Liberal Wahmen

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Mainstream media is pushing bug-eating to the point where it’s become a meme. In order to get you eating bugs and living in a pod, they have to make it seem cool and futuristic rather than dystopian. Remember, as long as you have guns, they can’t make you do anything you don’t want to do. Once you demand that your own guns be taken away, then, of course, they can do anything they want to you. But the first few times Fragile meets Sam, she constantly forces bugs on him. She can’t stand to see a man not eating bugs like some kind of scavenging vermin! We’ve gone from MGS5’s alpha supreme Kazuhira Miller selling burgers pumped full of based chemicals to Sam eating maggots that turn him into a hormonally deficient pod-dwelling urbanite sipping Starbucks and hashtagging about Orange Man Bad!

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Fragile’s interview sums up the liberal mindset. I’ll print the entire paragraph because it has several eye-rolling moments…

“We once had a network spanning the whole wide world that could send items from anywhere to anywhere, and connect anyone with anything. But still we were isolated – still we were alone. Some liked it that way, and even wanted more. They wanted walls along their borders, wanted to turn away refugees and outsiders.”

Not only does the email accidentally acknowledge that connecting online does nothing to alleviate loneliness, there’s also the cringe misunderstanding that enforcing basic border control policy and protecting the people within a nation is somehow a moral outrage. In fact her interview kind of reminds me of a celebrity tweet, like Alyssa Milano crying to let her followers know they are supposed to get angry because the nation they live in hasn’t collapsed on schedule. Also the idea that letting in the third-world will somehow end our loneliness is a really low IQ take, since the American experiment has shown that ethnic groups tend to form impenetrable enclaves rather than interact in any meaningful way.

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One more thing about Fragile and her female nature. Not only is her superpower instantaneous travel (what woman wouldn’t kill for that ability?), but… and this is a SPOILER (until the end of the paragraph)… she is forced to run through a timefall mostly naked, so her body is unnaturally aged. MGTOW types who are beyond sick of women often talk about the Wall. Not Trump’s Wall, mind you, but the concept of the Wall is that when a woman’s beauty fades, her power comes to an end. It’s incredibly sad and is far beyond what your typical bluepilled lefty can handle. They desperately want to believe that beauty is a state of mind available to everyone rather than a genetic lottery win given only to a few. The truth is that not having it is a drag and losing it is devastating. Not gonna lie, I cried during that scene!

I’m looking forward to learning more about Higgs, the man who forced this fate on Fragile. Is he evil, or just a bitter incel who wanted to permanently end Fragile’s Instagram career?

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The BTs: Reconnecting with History Is Terrifying to the Bluepilled

The BTs are a surprisingly conservative threat. From my perspective as someone who hasn’t finished Death Stranding, I can only say what I currently know about BTs, but they seem to be the spirits of the dead interacting with the living. Interestingly enough, for a game about making connections and breaking down borders, the main enemy, BTs, are border-crossers who are so dangerous that America cannot exist as long as they exist. You have to choose one or the other: Get the United Cities of America up and running, or keep importing BTs. You can’t have both.

The symbolism is so obvious, they may as well be wearing sombreros and trafficking guns, drugs, and sex slaves!

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It’s also interesting to note that the arrival of BTs is marked by a reverse rainbow. It’s very telling that Kojima uses the “woke” symbol of public CBT parades and drag queen storytime to let the player know they are approaching a gateway to the world of death. I feel like the fact that blue is missing from the rainbow has something to do with Democrats losing control of their own ride down the slippery slope.

Could Kojima be channeling the reversal of the rainbow as America’s slide into a sexual free-for-all continues? Remember, this happened before, in Weimar Germany, where you could pay to experience any and every sexual kink – even stuff that we would consider progressive now. The grasping hands of the BTs become even more frightening when you consider that they might have in mind something far worse than killing you!

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There’s something for liberals to fear about BTs, too. Being dead, the BTs represent spirits of the past – dark spirits from dark times. Looking back at history is one of the great fears of the modern enlightened liberal. History is non-utopian, thus they can only view it through the lens of complete indoctrination, which says that all history is BAD. Taking a nuanced look at various groups of people trying to survive under conditions that were not ideal is not the strong suit of liberals. Just think of how many liberals (especially women) you have heard say they’re afraid to look into their family tree because they might find Nazis or KKK members – the ultimate boogeymen of children raised on Hollywood movies!

That also makes chirality in general a very shocking idea in such a bluepilled story. Once the United Cities of America is reconnected, theoretically anything from the past could be 3D-printed. That means that the key to saving America (and the world) lies in reconnecting with history. From a liberal perspective, this makes absolutely no sense. Why would you want to reconnect with something that wasn’t progressive and isn’t the current year? But from a conservative standpoint, it makes total sense: You have to reconnect to a time that made sense, to a time when we knew what worked, in order to have a solid foundation on which to build the future.

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Stranded from the Almighty

In the world of Death Stranding, much like our own, communities have broken down and people live in isolation. They are addicted to mood-enhancing drugs just like we are. People are no longer hormonally capable of creating something as simple as oxytocin, a “cuddling hormone” used for social bonding, and must take a synthetic version. Because zoomers did not heed the wisdom of boomers regarding “cell phone bad” most people can only interact through “chiralgrams” or holographic facetime vids. Every NPC seems bland and lifeless until you walk away, then they bombard you with texts littered with emojis.

Kojima’s depiction of humanity gone insane is surprisingly subtle given his track record of over-the-top characters. When you consider games like BioShock where everyone infected by the Hot Topic virus becomes a juggalo clown from the dark carnival, or Badlands where cringe behavior is considered the norm, a story about people becoming asexual genderless freaks afraid to form bonds with one another and are no longer breeding is surprisingly and subtly redpilled. If Death Stranding showed unlimited immigration and ethnic groups forming uncommunicative enclaves and a “hatespeech” police force cracking down on people who point out the obvious, we could even say that Death Stranding is the redpilled game of 2019, especially since Doom Eternal’s release date has been pushed to 2020.

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Or not. Death Stranding is incredibly interesting but it is definitely not redpilled. It’s about connecting people, but broken people who connect with other broken people only find ruin and regret. This may seem odd to the modern gamer, a technophile with an unexamined love of science and who seriously believes they have outgrown the need for ritual and tradition and the rough traits that turned their ancestors into survivors rather than bugmen, but anyone who drifts so far from their own creator that they believe they were created by accident will of course end up on mood-altering medication. Mental illness is the inevitable result of distance from the mysterious force that sustains us. To the modern gamer who collects Star Wars figurines and anime memorabilia much like a Death Stranding MULE collects packages while “jacked up on a cargo high”, the drift into darkness and depression is subtle and seemingly inevitable. There is of course the sustaining belief that if we can just make it through the darkness of Kali Yuga we will eventually arrive at a utopian Star Trek future, but oddly enough, this belief is more fervent and unconscious than anything practiced in a seemingly-backward traditional community.

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More to come! As I continue my journey through the game, I’m hoping Higgs and Cliff Unger will give me more of a right-wing take on Death Stranding. I’m really looking forward to reaching the west coast and meeting what they call “crazy men” or homo demens. Leave it to Kojima to have “gay demons” waiting for the player in California!

 

Part 2: The End of Death Stranding: Occult Bluepill Black Magic vs. Big Jesus 5.56 MAGA Rounds

I Was Shot to Death While Watching JOKER! 10/10 Would Get Shot Again

By Kyle B. Stiff

What Black Panther is to African Americans, what Captain Marvel is to feminists who don’t watch superhero movies, what Thanos is to normies, Joker is to us… gamers? I mean Nazis. I mean incels. Or whatever the label is… let’s just say it’s the people who know civilization isn’t dying, it’s being murdered.

And we know who’s doing the killing!

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Mainstream media has been warning us about Joker, and for good reason: It gives voice to people who are sick of the degeneration of civilization. It’s been obvious for a long time that Hollywood is a cult, and it’s their job to present a gospel of life improving through lefty values and diversity indoctrination. That’s their job. They want us watching Captain Marvel and Disney Star Wars, not Joker, and they’re willing to push the idea that incels will shoot up a theater full of incels (huh?) to get their way. Of course, we all know what’s going on. We know civilization isn’t collapsing because the traditional values that have guided nations for thousands of years suddenly went past the sell-by date and now we have to make a frantic switch to atheist feminist Communism or else the world will burn up.

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But before you get too excited about Joker – and it is worth getting excited about – let’s get one thing straight: It’s not conservative or right-wing or trad or anything like that. It’s not even what Blade Runner 2049 was for us (a story about the Last White Guy doing his job and being hated while the world falls apart). While the creative minds behind Joker were definitely tapping into the collapse and the outrage we feel, that collapse and that outrage are still shown from a deeply left-leaning perspective. Remember, Thomas Wayne is rich and says insensitive things about the poor, Joker requires “free” mental health counseling, and the rioters carry signs that say RESIST, which is the battle cry of the Anti-Drumpf Orange Man Bad NPC Elite.

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In fact, Joker kind of reminded me of Back to the Future 2. Remember how that movie strangely predicted Trump’s presidency, as well as his ability to travel through time? Through the character of Biff Tannen, the makers of Back to the Future 2 clearly knew what was coming. However, instead of seeing it as an interesting cultural event and an opportunity to prune back the weeds of liberalism spreading through college indoctrination and Hollywood propaganda, the makers of that film saw it as a dystopian hellscape where white biker gangs roamed the streets shooting at teachers without any clear reason. Really, go back and look at that movie. It’s never explained exactly why the future is so dark, why white people have suddenly turned into violent savages – they just kind of did, and somehow it was Biff Tannen’s fault!

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So it’s a case of the oracle receiving a message from the gods, but the message is fractured by the unfortunate retardation of the human medium. While Joker is undeniably appealing to conservative men who feel impotent in the face of societal collapse, Joker is actually a snapshot of a liberal man lost in a sea of raging emotions and without any sort of rational compass that he can use to get a reality check. While we each retreat within our opposing bubbles, Joker is kind of an unexpected re-acquaintance with the lefty mindset. The fact that conservative men can relate just shows how tolerant and empathetic they are – imagine that!

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Remember, this movie was made by someone in Hollywood, not outside of it. Without doing any research, I’m going to go out on a limb (but not really) and say the director is a lefty, probably Jewish, and he thinks President Trump speaks a coded language that “dog whistles” (love that goofy term) secret messages to white nationalists and Russian handlers. I promise I will not even take the ten seconds required for a Google search to see if I’m right or not – I mean, do I need to at this point?

Anyway, the point is that this story is going to have a lefty slant to it, so I think Joker is a great example of what a liberal male would do if he was in the same position that a lot of white, conservative males are in. Unlike Officer K who kept going to work and pushed his emotions deep, deep down, Joker lashes out with unrestrained emotion. This dude even climbs into his… but I won’t spoil it! But god damn, guys – he really climbed in that thing, didn’t he?!

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The way Joker got a gun is a perfect example of this story coming from a liberal perspective. This paragraph will be a little spoilery, sorry. But Joker essentially has a gun forced on him by an alpha male who calls the ethnic kids who beat him “savages”. This is a liberal nightmare in technicolor – they don’t see gun rights as something that a person can choose to opt out of, because they don’t really understand choice. Sorry guys, but it’s true. The idea that a white bully would force someone to take a gun is top shelf liberalism, it’s something only they could imagine. It’s the same way you and your buddy don’t hold each others’ dicks while taking a piss. Your unit is yours, and his is his. But liberals tend not to believe in free will, and they think people can be converted to bad ideas without effort. That’s why they’re so big on censorship, banning, and deplatforming. That’s not a critique, that’s just the way it is.

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The fact that right off the bat we are shown that Joker is mentally ill favors my hypothesis. It’s kind of a meme at this point, but as long as you don’t get in a liberal’s face and accuse them of being mentally ill, they will readily discuss their collection of mental illnesses. Most of them are quite open about whatever it is they happen to have, whether it’s depression or anxiety or Asperger’s or ADHD or gender dysphoria or whatever. Most conservatives don’t get excited about having a mental illness, they don’t think it’s cool or interesting, in fact they tend to see it as something that should be overcome rather than something that adds spice and flavor to personality.

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Another great example of the liberal perspective is the bullies on the train – the business suit-wearing alpha males. This scene struck me as a little unrealistic, but I think it really shines a light on the liberal perspective. Years ago I lived in DC and I used the metro all the time. I was comically impoverished back then, and everything I wore was donated or bought from a thrift store. I saw lots of upwardly mobile suited types on the metro, and they never gave me any trouble. In fact, they ignored me, because they were interested in their own lives, which is understandable. The only trouble I ever got was from… well, how do I say it without getting in trouble? We’ll say “urban youths”. We all know this is how it is, but I think the liberal pain in this scene is very real. They feel a kind of visceral rejection by the world of business suit-wearing alphas, and they imagine that yacht-riding CEOs like Tai Lopez or Dan Bilzerian are laughing at them, secretly mocking them because they aren’t a part of the ultra elite .00001 percent. I used to assume that we were all laughing at elites, but these days I’m finding out that most of you guys are grinding your teeth at them, masking your envy with disdain.

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This paragraph is going to be somewhat spoilery (sorry). But just look at how badly Joker wants Thomas Wayne to be his father once he realizes the possibility is there. This whole situation makes me wonder if the basic liberal mindset is one formed by paternal neglect. We’ve all seen their irrational hatred for President Trump, a primal revulsion so over-the-top and so continual that we know it doesn’t come from rational disagreement on policies – in fact, Trump virtue signals liberal values with the best of liberals, and has done so for decades. We kind of suspect that the hatred comes from some kind of *intense* childhood trauma, because we can’t think of anything else that works on such a deep level. This makes the scene where Joker reads his mother’s file so powerfully moving (spoiler coming up, spoiler spoiler). He was a nobody, from nothing, with no father, abandoned by his mom and abused by strange men. Not going to lie, I cried!

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Of course, that makes me wonder if lefty extremists just feel unloved in general, not only abandoned by parents but perhaps abandoned by something even more profound. Maybe even abandoned by God. Do their bitchasses just need to go to church? They certainly have a visceral hatred for one religion in particular, the same one villified in Hollywood movies and on Netflix. When was the last time you heard a lefty complain about Islam or Judaism?

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I loved Joker, but of course it was always a stretch to hope that this movie would perfectly snapshot the anger of conservatives or right-wingers or groypers or trads or Chads or shitposters or volcels or incels or even the bowl cut enthusiasts or whatever the fuck you want to call the people who see patterns and aren’t NPCs waiting for the next goodthink update from the powers that be. Maybe despite his emotional instability, that’s what makes Joker our representative in this era: He sees patterns, and the thoughtpolice are afraid because they think Joker could be the spark to light the powder keg because he’s not afraid to snap. He’s not afraid to be the one to start the chaos that we all know is coming anyway.

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But who am I to say this? I’m just a guy who got shot in a movie theater. That’s right, dear readers – I’m already fuckin’ dead! As the credits rolled both exit doors popped open and several three-man shooter teams rolled up with heavy heat. “We’re a lone gunman!” they all shouted as they unloaded 5.56 ammo directly into my face. “Don’t report a three-man shooter team to the police, that really messes up the narrative! We’re just one white guy!” they repeated, as they reloaded and fired into my face again and again, spaghetti and sauce shooting from my ruined sinus cavity as heavy rounds tore through my skull. A few rounds even sliced through my guts and interacted with the refreshing diet beverage I’d been drinking just like they were Mentos, and the ensuing chemical reaction caused the Diet Garbage Juice to erupt from my bullet-riddled tubing like some kind of science experiment gone awry. My jaw shook convulsively as my teeth were pulverized and I think they imagined I was talking back, and that really pissed them off. Chunks of wet meatloaf flew from my bullet-battered skull as CIA and Mossad concentrated their firepower, living in absolute terror that their victim would not be one hundred percent on board with their dumb plans for world domination.

But it wasn’t all bad. I was just happy that Joker literally mentioned SOCIETY at the end!!!

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Rambo V: Last Boomer

In Which John Rambo Traps Blue-Haired Liberal Critics in His Tunnels and Hunts Them Down!

By Kyle B. Stiff

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I’m a big fan of Rambo, but I didn’t want to see Rambo: Last Blood. Being a product of Hollywood, I assumed it would be about John Rambo going on one last mission to help Mexican prisoners escape from Trump’s concentration camps while executing police officers and ICE agents in the name of diversity. I assumed the script would be written by James Gunn (the director of Guardians of the Galaxy) or one of his clones, and would include a lot of “witty banter” between “delightfully dysfunctional” social outcasts. I hate that stuff and I wanted to remember Rambo as he used to be, before Hollywood became the propoganda arm of a cult ten thousand times worse than Scientology. However… as soon as I heard that people were getting triggered over this movie, I had to see it for myself!

And, guess what – it’s beautiful!

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Rambo: Last Blood isn’t exactly a great movie, but it’s the very thing that we needed. It has a simple story, but the timing of its release, and its focus on narratives that liberals hate, is like a lighthouse beacon for the human spirit tossed in a storm of retardation that is destroying civilization (guess I’m taking the kid gloves off with the hyperbole here). I won’t spoil anything, but the basic gist of the movie is that John Rambo is living a quiet life dealing with the demons of his past (meaning: he got to commit a lot of based war crimes back in the day), he has a niece that he dearly loves, and she gets involved with Mexican gangsters – that is, human traffickers. If you’re liberal: Yikes. Fucking YIKES. “Uh, Yikes Department? I need to file a fucking claim, please! In fact my name is Karen and I need to speak to the manager about this shit!!!”

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Every liberal film critic hated this movie, but lots of normal people (that is, unindoctrinated people) liked or even loved it. Maybe this is obvious, but sometimes it’s good to state the obvious: The entire narrative of this movie simply cannot exist within the liberal narrative of how the world works. In the liberal world, there are no Mexican drug cartels or human traffickers. There are only disenfranchised people who were not properly served by society, and therefore they must I repeat MUST be allowed to come into America. Unfortunately they can’t, because our President (who is Literally Hortler) is enforcing regressive, archaic, outdated border security laws, and is even putting Mexicans into concentration camps, including Area 51. There may even be ovens and execution squads at these concentration camps, who knows?

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Since Hollywood is one hundred percent on board with this narrative, Rambo: Last Blood hits hard because it somehow came out of the very machine that’s been retooled to ONLY churn out stories that fit within a lefty narrative. Having rejected any sort of traditional religion, and yet still being human and thus requiring some kind of religion (or at the very least, a moral framework), Hollywood has chosen DIVERSITY. “Have you heard of diversity? It’s our strength!” Within that framework, a movie that shows Mexican gangsters keeping young sex slaves drugged and confined is downright blasphemous! It doesn’t matter that this movie also has good and heroic Mexican characters; no, within the extreme leftist narrative, you are not allowed to acknowledge that a Mexican is capable of immoral behavior. It would be like saying that diversity isn’t our strength – which it is, if you haven’t heard.

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Last Ride of the Boomers

It’s been said by those wiser than me that the zoomers will be our salvation, but Last Blood is kind of interesting in that it shows a boomer getting his shit together and squeezing out enough testosterone to mow down some bad guys just to help a defenseless girl, even rocking his boomer jams while he does it. In a world where right-wing guys are beyond sick of putting up with female troubles (some are even going MGTOW) and left-wing types praise women only when they act like men, it’s nice to see an old guy butcher some bad guys in the name of chivalry. One of the bad guys even says, “Only an old fuck would come back for some cut-up bitch.” It’s sweet and strikes a deep chord, especially among guys who have a protective instinct that they aren’t allowed to use. We can’t even compliment women or hold the door open for them, much less form militias and blast suspicious border-crossers to protect women who, let’s face it, never really understand how unbelievably dark the world can be.

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In some sense, the warrior mentality idolizes females even though (real talk) they don’t deserve idolization, but it’s kind of a “necessary lie” that holds civilization together. But civilization is falling apart. Rambo’s niece Gabriela was on her way to college where she was probably going to major in Socialist Gender Theory with a minor in Antifa Combat Tactics or “How to Hate Everything (Including Yourself)”. This beautiful young lady who loved her family and her Uncle Rambo would most likely come back home for the summer overweight, her hair either blue or shaved off, with a nose ring and a bunch of tattoos, leading some indoctrinated soyboy on a leash, and berating her Uncle Rambo for his  toxic masculinity. I’m trying to be spoiler-free here, so I’ll just say that whether Gabriela was going to *have a very bad time* with Mexican drug cartel animals or have her soul mutilated by left-wing cultists, she was fated to be sacrificed either way.

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There’s a lot about Last Blood that isn’t great, but its timely nature definitely takes it out of the “okay” category and makes it far greater than its otherwise plebeian nature might have warranted a few decades ago. The shots of Trump’s wall and Rambo’s improvised Mayan revenge ritual alone make it worth our time. In an era where every movie exists only for indoctrination purposes, I don’t know how this one slipped through.

This imperfect movie taps into our very real need to protect what we’ve worked so hard to build, because we’re powerless right now. Every day we see these cultists tearing down one institution after another. Despite what you might think, people aren’t dumb. They know society is falling apart, and they know it isn’t because traditional values, which have guided civilizations for thousands of years, are suddenly the cause of our downfall. Most people can’t articulate it, but they instinctively know that people with blue hair having emotional meltdowns because an election didn’t go their way is not normal. They know that there are certain things that seem to make crime rates skyrocket, and they don’t want their neighborhoods to become scary places where kids can’t run around and have fun, and they know the blue hairs and the professors and the obnoxious celebrities aren’t going to help. And these very loud weirdos aren’t trying to debate the merits of their ideas, either; they rely on shutting down dissent through censorship, and using emotional histrionics to control weak people and bludgeon strong people into submission. The meme “Are we the baddies?” definitely applies.

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I have to admit I got a kick out of Rambo’s creator being very vocal about how much he hated this movie. It’s one of those JK Rowling moments where the creator is desperately virtue signaling in order to remain relevant. JK Rowling is the most prominent representative of this pattern, which is especially amusing when you consider the “problematic” nature of her Gringotts goblins and the stereotype they represent. Whatever the case, I’m sure it’s tough when everyone you know is a lefty, and your entire reputation depends on how hard you virtue signal in public. I can’t imagine how miserable it must be!

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CONTROVERSIAL ENDING

Anyway, when the credits rolled, I hit the exit and unexpectedly met a three-man shooter team preparing to blast everyone in the theater. I’ve played a lot of Metal Gear Solid games so I was able to use my knowledge of stealth to hide and listen in on the black ops team.

I distinctly heard their commander say, “Remember – no Hebrew.”

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I feared the worst, but the attack was suddenly called off, and I followed the killers behind the theater. They had a mobile command center set up around some innocuously labeled vans, and I saw a drugged-up white kid sitting on the curb, his eyes glazed over from a pharmaceutical cocktail that enhanced his MK ULTRA training and his willingness to be a patsy in yet another “active shooter” incident.

I watched as the shooter team fell to one knee, bowing to a holographic image of George Soros in a black robe.

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“Master,” said one of the killers, “why must we stand down? If we want to disarm the American people, or at least convince them to disarm themselves, then you know we must have more shooter incidents!”

“Of course, my young padawan,” said Emperor Soros. “But our surveillance of the theater revealed that only ancient boomers are willing to go to a matinee showing of Rambo. Nobody cares about a bunch of white-haired old men!” Before the shooter team could break down into tears after losing the opportunity to shoot a bunch of people and blame it on a drugged up white kid, Emperor Soros smiled and licked his lips.

“Postpone the mission until JOKER!” he said, cackling like a cartoon-villain.

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I broke out into a cold sweat, dear reader, and I got the hell out of there. I’m looking forward to Joker, but I’m not looking forward to being shot, so hopefully we’ll have a few more false flag attacks and… er, that is, I mean I hope we have a few more actual shootings before Joker so we can all be disarmed before it hits theaters. That way we won’t end up in the inevitable situation that *everyone* is predicting!

I’ve always wanted to live my life as a disarmed slave anyway, and if Hollywood can help out with that, then I’m all for it!

 

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Joker: Why Wahmen Don’t Seem to Care

By Kyle B. Stiff

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I’m sure we’ll be disappointed in the end, but as it stands now, every young conservative guy is looking forward to Joker, and exactly zero females care. It’s one of those movies that seems like it embodies the spirit of our time, like a sign pointing out this feeling we have that something big is about to happen. The excitement we feel surrounding this movie is probably similar to the way a normie feels about Nintendo or Game of Thrones. Conservative males who are keeping an eye on the decline of civilization finally feel as if the Bluepill Factory that is Hollywood accidentally made something interesting.

But why is it only men who care? And even then, why only a certain kind of man?

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Men are dropping out of society. They’re committing suicide at record rates, they’re getting hooked on pain-killers, divorce rates are through the roof, the manual labor jobs are either going overseas or being taken by robots or undocumented aliens, college is no longer job training but advanced indoctrination, and yet mainstream media agrees that men are toxic, problematic, trolls, literal Nazis, or perhaps even worse liberal buzzwords. In fact, if a man complains about this situation, or even expresses some reservations about throwing away civilization in general, he risks losing his job. Who wants to employ a Nazi, right?

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From this perspective, a movie about a man who isn’t an alpha, but a regular guy beaten down by a world gone mad until he cracks and becomes something terrifying, is going to touch something in men that’s lain dormant for a long time. “Are you having any negative thoughts? All I have are negative thoughts.” For a gender whose specialty is pushing pain down where it can’t be seen, just so jobs can be kept and worlds can be turned, could a better quote ever be written?

Of course, all of that is from the perspective of men. But not even every man; certainly not the kind of man who vapes and streams Mario Party on Twitch and genuinely cares how Disney will wrap up the Star Wars saga. You know the type. Men who think “Desmond Is Amazing” is a sign that we’re progressing toward a Star Trek utopia rather than… well, the end.

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But what about women? From their perspective, Joker comes out of nowhere. It’s irrelevant at best, and dangerous at worst. Just think about the kinds of shows that women watch; can you think of anything appealing to women that has even a hint of what’s about to happen in our world? There aren’t any female talk shows warning women about Europe becoming a caliphate, or mocking California for becoming a third-world dump. Can you imagine feminist college classes warning women about the scary statistics concerning children raised by single moms? Yeah, right! Women get their news and their worldview from completely different media than conservative men, so as far as they know, we’re heading for a bright future. As soon as those crusty old men give up their positions as CEOs, women are going to fix everything! Right?

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The media that women consume tends to show women in a positive light, feeding into their resentment and amplifying their sense of being downtrodden. From their perspective, a movie about a man who snaps and puts on clown makeup is just creepy and weird, a non sequitur *seemingly* out of left field. They have no idea that the guys they refer to as trolls are the canaries in the coal mine, watching the world fall apart, putting the pieces together in a way that women really can’t, but we’re holding back because we’re afraid of the backlash.

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Anyway, what are the chances of some idiot shooting up a theater during a showing of Joker? How many Antifa degenerates are already cooking up something stupid? How many Feds are dressing up some poor guy whacked out on meds? Is anyone really going to be surprised when we get reports about a three or four-man shooter team killing people, and then all of a sudden the story changes and BAM! Mainstream media will be telling us the shooter was a white, right-wing extremist.

It wouldn’t be the first time, right?

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Godzilla’s Revenge: A Misunderstood Movie for Those With Enlarged IQ, Only Serious Brainiacs Need Apply

By Kyle B. Stiff

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Here’s a quick rundown on what may be the best Godzilla move of all time. It’s about a little boy who goes to Monster Island and meets Godzilla’s goofy-looking son, a creature with a battle cry that sounds like a donkey. They become friends while stock footage taken from other (better?) monster movies plays in the background. Most kaiju fans don’t take this one serious because it *seems* lighthearted, even silly. But, behold: Godzilla’s Revenge (also called All Monsters Attack) is the darkest Godzilla movie of them all.

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The movie opens with shots of an industrial wasteland.

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This is the urban jungle that formed Ichiro, our protagonist, a little boy growing up among steel girders and desolate parking lots with two parents constantly working and only a television to keep him company during dinner.

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We know right off the bat that Ichiro is not a cool kid as he explains to his little lady friend the sound that his imaginary monster friend makes. She is saved from his autistic cringe when a gang of bullies show up to assert dominance.

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This is life for Ichiro – being bullied in an urban hellscape with no one to protect him. It’s the opposite of the kaiju formula, where monsters who were made for endless war beat the shit out of each other throughout all eternity. Ichiro’s life is just a sad blip on the radar.

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The fact that Ichiro doesn’t wallow in sadness only makes his sad fate more apparent to the adult viewer (and more palatable to young viewers who just wanted to see some giant monsters fight each other).

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When Ichiro is alone, he dreams of being on Monster Island. He imagines that he is friends with Godzilla’s son, Minya (or Minilla), a sort of cute creature with a face that is nonetheless nightmare fuel. Minya is just as pathetic as Ichiro, though he puts on a brave face, simply stating that he has no friends so that there can be no confusion about his state. This may be more the result of Ichiro’s latent autism, in which his emotional disconnect with himself manifests in imaginary friends stating matter-of-factly that they are alone and without friends but not making a big deal of it.

 

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Minya is bullied by a monster called Gabara, a giant lizard with a cat’s head and wild orange hair. Gabara looks stupid and thus he’s a real shit, just the sort of thing that would be dreamed up by a young boy sorting through his own problems.

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In fact, it’s important to note that even though Ichiro retreats into a fantasy world to get away from life’s difficulties, I think it’s a psychologically healthy fantasy world. It doesn’t cater to his desires but presents him with the hard truths about life in a way that a young boy can understand. He doesn’t daydream about a world where everyone is nice to each other and nothing can hurt him. He knows that’s impossible. He knows the world favors the strong, and he wants to be strong, even though he’s scared.

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In his fantasy world, Godzilla doesn’t cut Minya any slack. One might make the mistake of thinking that being the son of the most powerful monster would guarantee you an easy life, but Godzilla didn’t become the most powerful by being soft. Godzilla doesn’t have time for Minya’s tears, and when Minya desperately seeks his help against his bully, his father pushes him back toward Gabara. On Monster Island, there is no room for weakness! In fact, I think the title All Monsters Attack isn’t necessarily an order, but a statement that this is what monsters do: They attack. We do the same. It’s how we survive!

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The funny thing is that once Minya gives the fight everything he has, Godzilla actually does help him when things get really hairy. When Minya embarrasses Gabara and Gabara loses his cool, Godzilla comes in, throws Gabara around, whips him with his tail, beats his face in, squats and shits on him, you name it. There’s a life lesson in there: No one will help you until you help yourself. Problems seem insurmountable but you still have to give it some effort, but once you do, help will arrive.

Or it won’t, and you’ll die.

Either way, it’s better than living in fear like a coward!

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In the end, Ichiro’s fantasies about Godzilla and Minya and the Monster Island lifestyle inspire him to fight to survive a pretty harrowing real-life situation in which some bank robbers kidnap him and even consider killing him. It’s a rough situation, no doubt traumatizing for someone as sensitive as Ichiro. It’s a grim reminder of the world he lives in, a mean urban toilet bowl where a grown man will pull a knife on you if you get between him and a bag of money. But in surviving, Ichiro gains perspective. When his bullies try to torment him the next day, he doesn’t even consider backing down. He already knows true pain, so he has nothing to fear, even against opponents bigger than him. He fights! He even beats the alpha who leads the bullies!

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But here’s the thing. When Ichiro wins the fight, does he force the bullies to give up their cruel ways? Does he make them slink off in shame so they can contemplate their misdeeds? Hell no – he becomes their leader!

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And his first act is to terrorize a painter working on an advertising billboard. The man falls over, covered in paint, and as Ichiro and his crew laugh at the man’s plight and run away, it is simply a continuation of the will to survive and fight and persist in a cruel world. Such is life on Monster Island, also known as planet Earth!

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It’s this point that deeply troubles many viewers, especially some guy on YouTube that spazzed out about this movie. The guy on YouTube said this movie’s morals are indefensible, that this movie is horrendous because it depicts kids saying hell and damn, and he hates the idea of bullied kids turning into bullies themselves. He thinks it’s an awful movie for kids to watch. I’m sure he’s one of those guys who thinks that children should only watch pleasant things, and should be taught that kindness means everything, and that discomfort must be avoided at all costs.

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Does that sound nice? It shouldn’t – those are the values that turn people into livestock! Life is cruel and the suffering only ends with death (and maybe not even then). Avoiding pain doesn’t lead to pleasure, but to weakness and further suffering. Once we grasp that simple fact, what better lesson could a parent give than to teach their children how to fight and survive, even if it means hurting them?